did they ever track down the baby born at dashcon?
you know, the dashcon baby… the baby born in the ballpit at dashcon
what
Th e
What
the dashcon baby
at dashcon, a late term pregnant lady (there for a writing panel i believe) arrived, and while going around the “event”, her water broke around 2 months earlier than expected, and began to go into labour, there was a huge traffic jam because of, you know, and driving to the hospital was out of the question, so they called an ambulance. But the thing is, because of the traffic jam, it took over 40 minutes, and she was going into labour NOW. A nurse in training there took over and had to deal with the woman, so they took the ballpit, being the best thing they could think of in the mostly empty area, cleared some of the balls away, and had to use that as a surface to deliver the baby. Around 5 minutes before they got there, they managed to deliver the baby, (thankfully) in a safe state.
this is a series of gummy commercials where it looks like the girlfriend is cheating on the boyfriend with this dashing dude who has longer gummies than him, and at the conclusion of the series of commercials after they get married and long man comes to the wedding it looks like the wife is going to leave with him but then long man confesses his love for the husband.
oh i saw an explanation for this on twitter! the mentos and coke are to suck all the oxygen out of the water, which forces the catfish to the surface because it Can’t Fucking Breathe. not really sure what the egg is for.
as a southerner, i don’t see the appeal in wasting good coke instead of shoving your hand inside and hoping to god there isn’t a copperhead or snapping turtle in there, but maybe this hole is particularly deep to preserve water during the dry season.
I cannot express how uncomfortable this makes me so I’m sharing it will all of you
The lady is a succubus, which in this setting is mostly human but with superpowered pheromones that passively make humans aroused just by being in the same room and essentially drug people out of their minds if she touches them directly. [The effect is so strong that there’s an entire government agency devoted to observing (from a long distance) all known succubi to make sure they aren’t starting suicide cults or going on murder-rape binges or whatever.] This causes her a variety of problems in life; she has to get up extremely early and stay at work late to take mostly-empty trains in order to avoid being in a crowded metal box full of humans, for example. But worst is her nonexistent love life, because how can you ever be confident that somebody has genuine romantic feelings for you if you’re supernaturally attractive to everybody? Is it ever morally acceptable to have sex if holding hands is effectively a date-rape drug?
The guy is a perfectly ordinary biology teacher, who crashed into her in the halls on his first day and got a huge dose of aphrodisiac. But she is a Respected Colleague so it would be Highly Unprofessional to think of her that way, not to mention how Inappropriate it would be for a high school teacher to do or say anything while there might be students around, and wait a minute wouldn’t treating her differently just because of her biology be Super Racist? so obviously it is his Duty to act Perfectly Normal and pretend that he Feels Nothing.
She sees that he seems to have no reaction, and this sparks her interest. Is he immune to her powers? Clearly this requires further investigation! For entirely scientific purposes, not because if he falls for her he’d be the first guy she could trust to do so for legitimate non-chemical reasons (and totally not because she might be able to bone him without feeling bad about it).
So you’ve got the world’s dorkiest succubus clumsily trying to seduce this guy and he’s trying very hard to drink enough Respect Women juice to make up for over half his blood travelling south every time he sees her. Then for added fun several of their students catch on to these shenanigans and they ship it so they decide to “help”.
Martin Shkreli, trollish ex-CEO of Turing Pharmaceuticals, who became
infamous in 2015 when he jacked up the price of an HIV medication
5,000%, received some unpleasant news today, reports CNBC.
The Supreme Court rejected his request for an appeal of his securities
fraud conviction. That means he’s going to have to serve the rest of his
7-year sentence and forfeit his $6.4 million fine.
While his fraud case was pending, Shkreli won the hearts of
Trumpsters when he put a bounty on a strand of hair from Hillary
Clinton’s head. His tweet did not get his desired result, though.
Instead, the judge revoked his bail and locked him behind bars for the
remainder of the trial.
If you serve me my food like that, I’m going to summon the spirits of all the poor people you gentrified out of this area to haunt you until you learn to cook like a normal person.
